Before I even start this I have to say how gangster I think it is that they play this song in the vatican....I'm sure Pac is like, "So what? WTF is the pope to me?" LOL....I never understand why this glorified clergyman is supposed to be so important to the world either. I've really never noticed anything he or any of his pope predecessors have done to make changes or advances in the world or for humanity. I very well could be wrong, but I really don't think I am. I do know it disgusts me the way the catholic church doesn't address their priest molesting children more aggressively......
But, I digress........I've noticed recently in my life that I need changes to happen. I am making those changes within myself. The person that I am. I meditate on my shortcomings and flaws and ask for guidance on correcting and/or eliminating those things that hinder my development. As a person I'm still developing. Still learning, still messing up, still succeeding and still TRYING. I feel if I weren't trying then that would mean I'm accepting my flaws, but I will never do that. I will accept that I am a flawed person but never stop trying to change those flaws.
For the "strong" person people say they see me as, sometimes I'm told I'm over-sensitive....Well, which is it? I can't see me being both.....Now I will accept whole-heartedly that I've made a mistake in a situation once it is pointed out to me (validly). I just will not allow someone to insult my intelligence. There are certain things about each person that is their "signature" something that they are "known" to do.....I am known to be very DIRECT in my tone. ESPECIALLY when I am angry.
When I speak, I don't hesitate with my words. Mainly because those words are thought out carefully before they fly out of my mouth. Now, that is NOT to say I never say the wrong thing. I DEFINITELY can be guilty of that. What I'm saying is I don't beat around the bush or put a lot of filler words in my dialogue like, "well um", "you know what I'm saying" or "like"......I feel that wastes time and I don't like my time wasted so I won't do that to another. Now, along with not hesitating, a lot of times I just don't say what I feel because I know what the consequences will be once I've stated my case.......
Nothing will change and someone will be mad or hurt or both. I'm a firm believer in:
1. Don't sweat the small stuff.
2. Don't ask a question if you are not prepared for a truthful answer.
3. Picking your battles
Number 3 is DEFINITELY the mantra I have to live by in my current situation. Mainly because so much is at stake and I'm not trying to mess anything up any further than it already is. However, even the battles I did not necessarily want to pick will HAVE TO be fought at one time or another. Sometimes you just have to pick that battle like the last kid left when you're picking kick ball teams. lol
When the die is cast for that battle you just have to put on your suit of armor and be prepared for the fall out and just hope the casualties are few and not mortally wounded......
I thank and appreciate all who will read. Peace.
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