30 March 2012

Hoodies for Justice...or Just US???

I had hoped to be able to enter this blog when there was a resolution...an answer...but, it seems like I'll be waiting forever & won't have a blog to enter while I await "justice".
"Justice" or "JUST US"???
Just US who suffer at the hands of murderers/bigots/hate mongers/OURSELVES???
I have stopped listening to, reading, watching the "latest" on the Trayvon Martin case.  I heard a snippet of a 911 call during a radio show & burst into tears.........THIS HURTS!!!
No, he wasn't my son/relative...no, I didn't know him/his family....no, I don't live in Sanford/Florida......but YES I AM HURT!!!
I keep playing the facts of the story out in my head....We all know it:

*He's walking to the store for snacks, minding his own business.
*Lunatic self-appointed neighborhood Barney Fife decides he shouldn't be in "his hood".
*Said lunatic calls the cops & IS TOLD NOT TO FOLLOW HIM.
*He follows him anyway & shoots him down because he has a hoodie on.......and
BECAUSE HE IS BLACK

Let's be real....white kids wear hoodies too. My daughter attends a diverse high school. There are a lot of white kids there, I see hoodies in the morning dropping her off.....
Now if Zimmerman had seen a white 17 year old walking in the neighborhood with a hoodie on....would that young man be "suspicious".  Would that young man have been followed?  Would the gun even been drawn? no & no.....IF ANY OF THIS HAD HAPPENED TO A WHITE CHILD WOULD ZIMMERMAN BE IN JAIL NOW?!?!? Yes, HELL YES!!! He would & be confined away from the general population for fear of his life.  We already know how the story would play if this was a black man who hunted down & killed a white child.....
But, let's be real again.........We trust "them" too much! We could see a white teen in our neighborhood today & not think anything but, "He is in the wrong area or lost." Some of us "trusting Negroes" would maybe even stop & try to help "massa's chile" find his way.
I live in an urban area....while my subdivision looks suburban...not even a block away from my front door you see abandoned buildings. Walking my dog or driving near my home I've seen "them" riding in my neighborhood slowly looking "lost"....looking to be all different age groups from young to old...sometimes in a group....sometimes alone...
I know what they're doing......One of two things: drugs or prostitutes...or both.........Up until recently I never thought that instead of my usual *smh*...maybe I should call the police & report a "suspicious character" in my neighborhood. Yea, right...and maybe I should pay the citation they will give me for calling 911 for a "non-emergency".  I doubt if I told them suspicious looking white people were riding around my neighborhood they would even send a car to investigate....but even in my urban city that is predominantly African American....if I called 911 to say there was a suspicious looking BLACK person in my neighborhood, there would be at least two cars out within a matter of minutes.
We are more afraid of ourselves, than them. Which is RIDICULOUS!!! Historically....most of the most abhorrent murders/atrocities have been carried out by WHITE men.......without a reason or care to why...and they have historically gotten away with it!!!
George Zimmerman is no different than the slave owners who bought/sold/raped our ppl for hundreds of years & then when their (or what they thought was their, cuz he may have been half black..lol) President Lincoln, gave us a "Get out of jail free" card. It was like....Well, ok. They don't have to be our property anymore, but we're not apologizing or giving them any of the country they built! And, they can't drink/sleep/eat/pee anywhere we are.
He's no different than the Klan members who terrorized innocent black families just because they wanted to live & take care of their families....No different than J. Edgar Hoover's cross-dressing behind, who stalked black men (probably because he secretly lusted after them) who were just trying to maintain their quality of life.....No different than the LAPD who beat Rodney King. I can go on & on with this (Bernard Goetz, James Earl Ray, Skinheads..etc).......but most shocking of all....He's no different than the gangbangers/thugs in our own community!!!
How can just "us" in our own backyard, protest & wear hoodies "4 Trayvon" while executing genocide on our own people? Shooting into a home putting bullets into two young girls while they play?!?! Killing on the streets over drugs/money/lovers.......then as they sit around together they say how "Fucked Up" it is that Zimmerman is still free!!!!
Yes, it is VERY messed up that Zimmerman (the animal) is still walking free after murdering that child....but it is just as messed up that us killing US is still running rampant....it is messed up that NEITHER race is putting a value on black life.
I expect it from them.........but, what about US???? 

I thank and appreciate all who will read & I pray for justice for #Trayvon, Britney, Rebia, Albert & all the other victims past, present & unfortunately...future. Peace.

04 March 2012

I Still Feel Her......


"When the day turns into the last day of all time....." <3 Prince

I've never really did anything special for my birthday. I haven't had a birthday "party" since I gave myself a 25th birthday party in _____well, let's just say that was a few years ago. :)
My last few birthdays have been EXTRA hard. This is the 3rd one since my Mama left, the 2nd since I my friend Thelma left.....
Waking up this morning I had to meditate....I needed to talk to God & Mama. I had to feel them telling me that it is ok to be happy about making another year. Even though she won't have anymore birthday celebrations, it's ok if I do. I put my conversation with Him on hold & spoke directly to my Mama.
I wanted to make sure that she understands that me having a good time doesn't mean that I don't miss her singing "Happy Birthday" to me off key while she snaps her pretty fingers & does a little dance. LOL
While I always said, "Oh Lord" when she did it. We both knew that I loved it when she did.
I know Thelma would tell me, "Girl, you betta do what you do how you wanna do it. Don't worry about me.".....I don't know what would make me think my Mama wouldn't feel the same way.
I've always known even through our good times/bad times/fusses/fights that she always wanted me to be happy.
While I sat in silence listening to her. I felt her tell me basically what I already know;

I felt her saying she loves me.
I felt her saying it's good for me to be happy.
I felt her saying it's quite alright to enjoy life.
I felt her saying.....Happy Birthday Baby!

And all I can say in response is Thank You to the most Beautiful Girl in the World! <3 Mama

I thank and appreciate all who will read. Peace.